I've been at it again. My moods, depression and anxiety mainly, have been talking way too much to me. And I have been trying to keep their mouths busy by just stuffing them with food. I hate myself so much recently.
I feel like crap. My self confidence is going way down. I feel so ugly.
So now I start eating hardly anything at all. But THEN because my body has gotten so accustomed to so much food I binge. UGH! I feel so gross. I feel so fat even though I know I'm not. No one ever sees me as fat but I feel so tubby, the cartoony trumpet music plays in my head when I walk.
I am also so out of shape and with depression fucking up my brain, I have absolutely no zeal to exercise. Then all of these things are piling up on me and making me feel horrible about myself.
I'm just gonna have myself a teeny tiny martini. Or 4.